Our bodies are natural and normal and healthy; while some health problems are associated with some forms of intersex, simply being intersex isn’t a health problem in and of itself. Females typically have ovaries, but the fact that some women can get ovarian cancer doesn’t mean being female is a disease, right?
— Claudia on Claudia is Intersex, Let’s Talk About It, Autostraddle.
Just a few of my internet bugaboos. What are yours? Happy Monday!
If _______, then you’re doing it wrong.
Louise Sawyer: Decaf or regular?
Girl in diner: Uh, regular, please.
Louise Sawyer: You girls are kinda young to be smokin’, dontcha think?
[girls roll their eyes]
Louise Sawyer: Ruins your sex drive.
[cut to Louise lighting up in the back room]
Louise: I’m in deep shit; Deep Shit, Arkansas.
Thelma: Yep, that’s him going. I love watching him go.
Louise: Remember when we first met?
Louise: What happened? Tell me what you said.
Jimmy: I said you had a nice pair of eyes.
Louise: And what did I say? You remember?
Jimmy: Yeah, you shut ‘em. Asked me if I knew what color they were?
Louise: And what’s you say?
Jimmy: I didn’t know.
Louise: [She covers his eyes] Jimmy, what color are my eyes?
Jimmy: They’re brown.
J.D.: Well, I’ve always believed that if done properly, armed robbery doesn’t have to be an unpleasant experience.
J.D.: I’d just kind of waltz on in and I’d say, ‘Ladies, gentlemen, let’s see who wins a prize for keeping their cool. Simon says, ’Everybody down on the floor.’ ‘Now nobody loses their head, then nobody loses their head’.
‘Uh… You, sir. Yeah, you do the honors. Take that cash and put it into that bag right there. You’ve got an amazing story to tell your friends. If not, well, you got a tag on your toe. You decide’.
Simple as that.
Thelma: You could park a car in the shadow of his ass.
This proves two things:
Firstly, that God moves in extremely mysterious, not to say, circuitous ways. God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of His own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players*, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch-dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a Dealer who won’t tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time.
* ie., everybody.
‒ Good Omens, Neil Gaimanand and Terry Prachett
"I used to work at McDonald’s making minimum wage. You know what that means when someone pays you minimum wage? You know what your boss was trying to say? ‘Hey if I could pay you less, I would, but it’s against the law.’"-Chris Rock (via lamaracuya)
How gross is everytime I have to come out to a boy friend. It always look to me so pretentious on my part.
"The young always have the same problem—how to rebel and conform at the same time. They have solved this by defying their parents and copying one another."-Quentin Crisp (via tall-like-the-clock)
This is still my favorite costume we’ve ever done.
My life as a dog (Mitt liv som hund), 1985.